12 years

Leaving our wedding, 9/9/00

Yesterday, Matt and I celebrated 12 years.  We began our journey into the mystic on September 9th, 2000.  The thunder and lightning during our vows may have been a harbinger of some sort, but so was the clear, beautiful night that unfolded after the storm. 

Sometimes our life reminds me
of a forest in which there is a graceful clearing
and in that opening a house,
an orchard and garden,
comfortable shades, and flowers
red and yellow in the sun, a pattern
made in the light for the light to return to.
The forest is mostly dark, its ways
to be made anew day after day, the dark
richer than the light and more blessed,
provided we stay brave
enough to keep on going in.

– Wendell Berry, The Country of Marriage (excerpt)

Lately I’ve been interested by wedding rings.  If you are married, do you have anything engraved inside your ring?  Does your spouse?  In case you are curious, I don’t have anything, because my ring couldn’t be engraved, but Matt’s says “you are my sunshine.”

Matt, I am still amazed. Thank you. 

Get Lindsey's thoughts on mindful living and parenting in your inbox


  1. Caroline
    Posted September 10, 2012 at 4:57 am | Permalink

    Happy anniversary!

    I’m not married, but I have my great-grandmother’s ring, which is engraved with their initials and the date: O.K.K. to T.P.P. 23 – 4 – 1910

  2. Posted September 10, 2012 at 5:21 am | Permalink


  3. Posted September 10, 2012 at 5:30 am | Permalink

    Happy anniversary 🙂 I love that photo!
    Nothing engraved… but I’m on my third wedding band. Kind of odd. The one we had picked to go with my engagement ring made my finger swell and bump up… then we tried another… same thing… finally we bought a thin platinum band, and it’s perfect. There might be a bit of symbolism in there 😉

  4. Posted September 10, 2012 at 5:35 am | Permalink

    I love this. Congrats. xo

  5. Amy
    Posted September 10, 2012 at 6:29 am | Permalink

    Congrats! Love this poem. My ring couldn’t be engraved either!

  6. Posted September 10, 2012 at 6:49 am | Permalink

    Happy Anniversary to you & Matt! My ring isn’t engraved but Pete’s is. It was orginally Pete’s grandfather’s ring, on the day of Pete’s parents wedding, he took it off his finger and gave it to Pete’s Dad who wore it for 30 years until he gave it to Pete for our wedding. So I had it engraved with all three wedding dates.

  7. Posted September 10, 2012 at 7:07 am | Permalink

    Happy anniversary to you and Matt. Neither my or B’s rings are engraved. Wish they were, but mine’s too thin to engrave.

  8. Posted September 10, 2012 at 7:21 am | Permalink

    Congratulations, I love that picture. My ring isn’t engraved either. It’s Jewish tradition to get married with a completely unbroken band (which I think is a really beautiful symbol in itself). Some people get theirs engraved after the ceremony, but I like the idea of keeping mine exactly as it was on the day we got married.

  9. Lucy Beliveau
    Posted September 10, 2012 at 8:37 am | Permalink

    What a lovely photo! Thank you, as always, for sharing such beautiful parts of your life with us! My to ring is all filigree so there is not a large space to say much. You’ve got me thinking though, and a date a several initials would be nice! I’ll work on that!

  10. Posted September 10, 2012 at 11:38 am | Permalink

    My husband and I celebrated 11 years on 9-1. My ring is engraved with Joined in Love, which was on our invitation. His too is engraved with You are my Sunshine.

  11. Erin
    Posted September 10, 2012 at 12:01 pm | Permalink

    So beautiful! Are you sure about the ring? Mine has the teeny, tiniest space and it was engraved. Both of our rings have the date and RILY — remember I love you. Happy Anniversary! xoxo

  12. Posted September 10, 2012 at 7:39 pm | Permalink

    We both have “to my lobster” and our wedding date in our rings. The story is here: http://www.themeaningofme.com/a-lobster-tale/.

    Happy Anniversary!

  13. Posted September 10, 2012 at 9:19 pm | Permalink

    We both have our initials (from and to) and the date. And my engagement ring is my Grandma’s with the tiniest engraving on their initials and their engagement date. Though I rarely wear that one anymore. My husband gave me a rose gold band nearly four years ago and promised to engrave it, but I haven’t taken it off since.

  14. Posted September 10, 2012 at 9:20 pm | Permalink

    And congratulations! 12!!!

  15. nancy
    Posted September 11, 2012 at 10:09 am | Permalink

    My parents’ wedding anniversary was 9/9; would have been 58 years if they had lived to see it. My dad didn’t wear a ring; my mom’s said RMK to HFK 9/9/54; my husband and I did ours the same way: so mine says RBB to NKB 8/27/89; his says NKB to RBB 8/27/89. Am loving your posts, which resonate with me big time–cheers!

  16. nancy
    Posted September 11, 2012 at 10:11 am | Permalink

    (whoops….I lied: forgot what my initials were before I added spouse’s name–so where I wrote NKB should say NEK….)

  17. Posted September 11, 2012 at 2:19 pm | Permalink

    Congratulations on your anniversary! And many happy returns of the day!

    No engravings on our bands, but “into the mystic” would be a lovely one, methinks.

  18. Leslie
    Posted September 12, 2012 at 1:24 pm | Permalink

    Congrats to you! My husband and I celebrated our 12th anniversary in May. Our rings are both engraved with “Love never fails.” and the wedding date.

  19. Leslie
    Posted September 12, 2012 at 1:25 pm | Permalink

    (Me again.) I forgot to say that after my husband and I decided on the engraving, I realized my parents had “Love never faileth.” in their rings. Maybe I’d known that all along and only remembered subconsciously – I don’t know.

  20. Amy
    Posted September 14, 2012 at 4:43 pm | Permalink

    Happy anniversary! We are celebrating 10 yrs in a few months, but both on our 2nd ring (his = lost while scuba diving, mine = wanted something less flashy). You have me thinking about the engraving, though…

  21. Judy
    Posted December 28, 2012 at 2:36 pm | Permalink

    Happy 12th anniversary, Lindsay and Matt.
    I wear my maternal grandmother’s ring, which is engraved June 21, 1893, a special treasure,
    as she died 4 years before I was born.

  22. Judy
    Posted December 28, 2012 at 2:38 pm | Permalink

    Why did a mean purple face appear next to my comment above?