Last week I mentioned how tired I am lately, how quiet and reserved I’m feeling. That is manifesting in a lot of ways, and one of them is a real lack of inspiration to write. But I am determined to honor my commitment, here and elsewhere. So, a few things that I’m thinking about and doing these days.
- I am trying to run a few days a week, shorter distances and slower than before, because of the aforementioned exhaustion. Still, for my mental health, I need to get out there. I hate treadmills and run outside all year long, including in the rain or snow. Mostly, I run at 530 in the morning because that is the only time I can reliably go. In these weeks, before the clocks turn back, it is pitch black at that hour. I ran last week in the pouring rain, in the dark, and felt like the only person in the world. It was strangely soothing. I need to be extra careful not to trip though, something that’s a hazard for me even in full sunshine.
- I am reading The Long Goodbye and finding it incredibly beautiful, though also deeply sad. Next up is The Bread of Angels, the author of which my sister has met in Jerusalem. I figure it will resonate on many levels, and will start getting me in the mindset for our trip to Israel in December.
- I am writing fiction. Well, I’m trying. My friend Kathryn has been urging me on in this direction for a while. We’ll see what happens. One observation so far: I am sure there is some meaning, some subconscious message, in the tense we instinctively choose. My automatic voice is in the present tense. I often have to go back and correct, like a first grader in grammar class, basic verb tenses, because my voice is always tugging towards the present. I wonder what this means.
- Hilary is homesick. A little. And so are her girls. And she told them the perfect truth: “you know, you can feel two things at the same time.” Yes, yes, you can.
- I am listening to Something Beautiful, by Alexi Murdoch, on repeat. Enormous thanks to the vivid, gorgeous, and wise Jen Lemen for pointing me to it.
May the grace of God be with you always, in your heart
May you know the truth inside you from the start
May you find the strength to know that you are part of something beautiful …
What are you listening to, reading, doing, thinking about, and feeling lately?
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